dewey decimal is a dork

so my feet ache. think it's cuz i never sit? seriously, i sit when possible...it's just that it's for like a nanosecond at a time. usually nick is getting into something and there is no sitting for me. when we were in california visiting my grandparents, my opa and i took nick to the park and while we were getting ready to leave, opa asked me if i wanted a lawn chair. i was like, "um, op, i don't sit at the park...." he laughed and totally didn't get it, but whatever...then we got to the park and he clearly understood. the rest of the week when we were getting ready for the park, he never even packed a chair for himself, ha!


went to the library today to check out a book on how to help me deal with nicholas and his new "attitude." so i have the name of the book and the author, but i have NO CLUE how to find this thing. i am holding nick, because when we are at the library, he thinks it's a free-for-all and he starts pulling random books off the shelves all the while laughing and saying "book" "book on floor" "mama, book, i drop it" SO, i am in an aisle, pretending to know what i am doing, looking for a book that i can't find, trying to remember how that dewey decimal system works, and wishing i would have paid attention in elementary school on "library day." whatever, and by the way, WHY do we use this dewey decimal system anyway? (random thought, do you remember the bookmobile? like i would ever let my kid into a dark trailer on wheels with some guy out on parole driving around to all the schools? and they'd only let like 4 kids in at a time...hmmmm....) anyway, back to goofy dewey. is he for real? or is that just some made up system name? here's how i think the library should work: ok, you look up online what book you want to check out, shoot them an email or order it with their "check out order form," tell them when you will be there to get the book and then call the librarian from your cell when you pull up, they have some dude named dewey run the book out to you, he has a machine (like a credit card reader) that scans your library card and the book and he prints out a receipt. dewey gives you the book, transaction final. SO EASY. i might just start my own library. AND like blockbuster, my library would have no late fees. since this utopia library doesn't exist, i had to go up to the desk, and ask the chic to help me find the book. i thought she was going to send me to a computer and make me look it up myself AND i think she would have but nick had just farted, so she wanted us out of there. she had to order the book for me, and she said she'd call me when it was in. see??? my library plan is already starting to work....